Light and Dark
As we approach the darkness of the new moon I’ve watched my energy waning in alignment with the lunar force. A time to be still and inward as we sit with the darkness within. I’ve spent days lying on the couch, energy completely drained from my body, like a deflated balloon. A time for me to ponder and give space for my wisdom to come through.
As I’ve allowed myself permission to align with the tides of the universe i’ve received many insights. For several days I sat in the discomfort of the uncomfortable. Confusion set in. So many enquiries for myself. I buried myself in Human Design - deepening my study. I meditated and journeyed to feelings of other life times. A deepening.
Eventually through the confusion comes clarity. As if someone suddenly turned the light on. I know myself fairly well thanks to 44 years on this earth plane, deep study into Human Design, years of Shamanic Practices and the other paths of personal development I’ve taken. This confusion to clarity is a pattern for me - something I’m learning to be comfortable with.
One of the many things alive in me at this time is that I don’t want to live in a homogenized world. This has been massive teaching from Human Design. A learning to recognise and love my uniqueness. A learning to decondition. A deconditioning, through Shamanic Practices, of all parts of myself that are not me. Parts that other lifetimes, my ancestors, my friends and society have laid on me like a cloak of inauthentic and wounded feathers. One by one I pluck them and let them fall away.
A piece that has been a mirror in my surroundings lately is one of light and dark. There are those that hide their dark in fear of not being liked. The classic people pleaser. A piece in which most of us carry to different degrees. And then there are those that spend an awful lot of time convincing those around them of what 'good people' they are. Who are they really trying to convince?
Love and light bullshit is where the dark is so squashed that it lurks in unhealthy places in the shadows. This is where it leaks in it’s most toxic forms. This is where we need to use the light to shine on our darkest parts so that they can be seen and integrated in healthy ways. None of us are pure love and light. We’re not gurus or ascended masters. We’re human and we fuck up. We’re consistently learning, growing and letting go.
When there is space there is a remembering. To be whole beings we need an integration of healthy light and dark. The more integrated I become, the more I walk my true self. The more I heal myself and let go of my conditioning the more my soul gifts emerge.
Light and dark love and blessings.